Hitsugaya had a great dislike of physical contact in any form. 1st on his list of things to avoid was being smothered by Matsumoto's overly exposed chest. 2nd on that list was any kind of touch not found in battle. 3rd on his list was battle contact. If Hyourinmaru touched his opponent that was fine, it was the point. However, when his skin actually came in contact with his opponent that was bad. So far today Matsumoto had managed to catch him in one of her smothering hugs and a hollow he'd dispatched had gotten a tentacle-like appendage around his neck.

Now, he was facing Kurosaki Ichigo up close and far too personal. Kurosaki, under the excuse that Hitsugaya was far too tense, was massaging his shoulders. It should be easy to get out of the situation as Kurosaki wasn't holding him down with any kind of power. In fact, his touch, while firm, was clearly not aiming to make Hitsugaya stay against his will.

So why was Hitsugaya just sitting there letting Kurosaki touch him?

The tensai taicho couldn't say and was actually worried about what the answer might be. After all, he hated physical contact of any kind, didn't he?

Hitsugaya felt a particularly nasty knot release and his shoulders slumped a little as he relaxed. He sighed softly, surprised at himself, but he didn't tense up again like most would have expected him. Kurosaki gently pulled back on Hitsugaya's shoulders, drawing him against Kurosaki's chest. His hands slowly worked down the taicho's back, working out every stubborn knot his fingers found. Hitsugaya leaned back so that he was completely resting against Kurosaki's chest, eyes closed, completely relaxed. Kurosaki wrapped his arms around Hitsugaya's waist lightly.

"Toushiro," he whispered softly, "you still awake?"

"Sort of," Hitsugaya murmured, too comfortable to protest the use of his given name and not his title.

Kurosaki chuckled softly and shifted so that they were lying on his bed. "Go to sleep, Toushiro," he murmured as he slid his fingers into Hitsugaya's hair, massaging his scalp. "You're not on duty."

Hitsugaya tried to stay awake, tried to reason out why it was okay for Kurosaki to be touching him, holding him. But sleep was overcoming him and the only thought he had left was that Kurosaki's lips felt really nice and warm pressed against his neck like they were.

-----

Hitsugaya stirred slowly, rubbing at his eyes to rid himself of the last remnants of his dream. He felt lips press against the side of his neck and an arm flex slightly around his waist. He tensed slightly, feeling more like himself than he had been earlier.

"Sleep well?" Kurosaki asked in a soft whisper against the curve of Hitsugaya's ear. The small taicho shivered, unsure of how to answer that question. He had slept well, but now he was completely freaked out about the fact that Kurosaki's body was cradling his own. This was far from normal and what made it all so much worse was the fact that he felt more comfortable than he could ever remember being in the past. "Toushiro? You're being awful quiet."

Hitsugaya shifted, intent on getting the hell out, but Kurosaki's arm tightened around his waist, keeping him in place. He looked down surprised to see the tan skin resting against his pale stomach. How did he not remember taking off his top? This was really getting to be too much for the tensai. "Let go, Kurosaki. I need to work," he stated flatly, glaring at the wall because his back was still pressed to Kurosaki's chest.

"You don't have to go yet. It's still night," he replied softly. Damn, Kurosaki was right. The light in the room was from the full moon, not the sun. "You said earlier that you don't have to be back in Soul Society until morning. Besides, you need a break. There a reason your muscles are so tight," Kurosaki whispered and pressed a kiss to the back of Hitsugaya's neck.

Hitsugaya shivered at the touch, relaxing again. Kurosaki shifted slightly and pushed Hitsugaya on his back before leaning down to kiss the taicho. Hitsugaya moved his hands to Kurosaki's chest intent on pushing him away. He didn't need to, though, since Kurosaki pulled away rather quickly. "What did you do that for?" he demanded.

Kurosaki shrugged slightly, propping himself up on his forearms. "You're cute," he replied. "I thought you were okay with this. You didn't seem to mind the massage or sleeping in my arms."

"Those are completely different things!" Hitsugaya protested, blushing a little much to his annoyance. "You can't just assume its okay to kiss another guy!"

"If you liked girls you'd be dating Hinamori-san, wouldn't you?" Kurosaki asked, brushing his fingers through Hitsugaya's hair. "I'm not asking for your virginity, Toushiro. I'm just asking for your permission to help you relax a little."

Hitsugaya frowned. "You're not one to talk about relaxing, Kurosaki," he chided as he pulled his hands away, surprised that they had stayed on Kurosaki's bare chest for so long. He looked away. "Every time I see you, you're wound tighter than I am."

"That's because you see me during war times or battles. You don't see me when things are going smoothly," he murmured, massaging Hitsugaya's scalp gently. "From what I've heard, you don't ever relax." Gently he turned Hitsugaya's head and pressed their lips together. The taicho's hands stayed at his sides and he didn't pull away, but he wasn't really responding either. Kurosaki pulled away again, shifting so that he could lie on his side next to Hitsugaya and slid his arm across Hitsugaya's waist. "We should probably get some sleep," he said softly.

Hitsugaya shifted, turning his back on Kurosaki, thoroughly confused by everything that had happened in the past few hours. Kurosaki shifted close to him so that Hitsugaya found his back pressed up against Kurosaki's chest once again. Why did Kurosaki seem to need so much physical contact? Didn't he realize that this was way too personal for the young taicho?

"I can be patient," Kurosaki whispered and fell silent, his breath slowly evening out. Patient? Patient for what? Hitsugaya wanted to ask, but he couldn't bring himself to because he was fairly certain the answer would be 'you' and he didn't want to know if that was the truth. He just wanted to be able to leave and go back to Soul Society where everything made sense and overly touchy feely substitute Shiningami weren't trying to invade your personal space.

Part 2

Hitsugaya made his way through Seireitei at a leisurely pace, in no hurry to return to 10th squad headquarters. Soul Society was finally back to running how it was supposed to run and he was completely caught up on his paperwork. He knew that Matsumoto was out with Hinamori and a few of the other women Shiningami. She had said something about being gone all night. It would be a welcome break. When Hitsugaya finally returned to headquarters he stopped dead in his tracks. Kurosaki Ichigo was leaning up against his desk, looking through one of his books.

"What the hell are you doing, Kurosaki?" he seethed as he stormed over, door slamming shut behind him, and took the book from Kurosaki's hands. He walked over to his bookcase and put it back where it belonged.

"I came to see you," Kurosaki replied easily.

Hitsugaya twitched. He'd been avoiding the substitute Shiningami since that night Kurosaki had kissed him. He'd gone so far as to send Matsumoto to the real world instead of going himself. Hitsugaya started straightening his books to avoid turning around and facing Kurosaki. "You've seen me so you can go home now," he stated firmly, wanting to be rid of the intruder.

Kurosaki was moving toward him. Hitsugaya turned around quickly, wishing he was carrying Hyourinmaru because Kurosaki had him trapped against his books and it wouldn't do to use kidou and create a fuss. "Do you want another massage? You're really tense again," he said calmly as if everything was perfectly natural and happened every day.

Hitsugaya glared at Kurosaki, arms folded across his chest. "Go home, Kurosaki. You clearly aren't here because of your substitute Shiningami duties. Don't come here if you don't need to," he snapped. Kurosaki ignored him, slipping his hand behind Hitsugaya's neck and started massaging the tense muscles. "Stop it, Kurosaki," Hitsugaya growled, but his body was betraying him. Even as he tried to convince Kurosaki he wasn't welcome, his muscles started to relax and knots eased.

Kurosaki smiled and wrapped his long, calloused fingers around Hitsugaya's wrist, thumb resting against the taicho's racing pulse. "Come on, Toushiro. Let me help," he said softly and took a step backward, headed for the couch in front of Hitsugaya's desk.

Hitsugaya wanted to say no, to tell Kurosaki to leave so that he wouldn't have to deal with the unsettling feeling he had whenever his thoughts turned to the substitute Shiningami. He couldn't make himself say it, though. The hand on the back of his neck and the fingers around his wrist felt warm and good. He was already starting to relax under Kurosaki's fingertips.

Kurosaki slid onto the couch, pulling Hitsugaya forward and into his lap. The small taicho flushed lightly even as he settled against the large chest and rested his forehead against Kurosaki's shoulder. What the hell was going on? Why was he so pliant beneath these calloused fingertips? Why didn't it feel weird or wrong or troublesome? Why did it feel so good? He didn't have any answers to his questions and he couldn't voice any of them. Kurosaki seemed to understand though, rubbing his back as if to soothe him.

Hitsugaya slowly relaxed, letting the questions slip from his mind even as Kurosaki pushed his top from his shoulders, exposing snow pale skin. His shoulders tensed when he felt lips pressed gently to the skin, but they relaxed again just as quickly. Kurosaki was being gentle. The great idiot who always went charging in without a plan was being so gentle it made Hitsugaya's skin ache for more of that touch. Kurosaki gently cupped Hitsugaya's chin in his hand and tilted his head back so that they were looking at each other.

"Will you let me kiss you?" he asked softly.

That blew Hitsugaya's mind. Was Kurosaki actually asking permission? His mind screamed no that it wasn't alright for Kurosaki to be kissing him, but his body was betraying him again. His head was nodding consent and then Kurosaki's lips were on his. Hitsugaya had little experience in the department of kissing like this; in fact, the only other time he'd been kissed on the lips was that night in Kurosaki's bedroom. He'd always been so focused on something else that he'd never even considered what it would be like to kiss someone like this.

Kurosaki's fingers were still wrapped around Hitsugaya's wrist, steadying him, anchoring him as he pressed a little harder into the kiss. Hitsugaya didn't really know what he was doing, but somehow in the less rational part of his brain decided that mimicking Kurosaki would be a good start. Kurosaki's hand moved from Hitsugaya's chin to cup the back of his head, tilting it back slightly as he shifted their positions. Hitsugaya slowly brought his hand up to rest on Kurosaki's shoulder, not sure what else to do with the one not being held in Kurosaki's light grip and wondering if he was even doing this right. Kurosaki pulled away slowly, resting their foreheads together.

"Are you alright, Toushiro? You're shaking," he whispered softly, running his thumb back and forth across the taicho's wrist with all the gentleness he could manage, but it did nothing to slow the faint tremble running through Hitsugaya's body. "Toushiro?" he questioned again, pulling the taicho closer.

"I'm fine," he whispered back, voice hoarse. It sounded so strange to his ears he could barely recognize it as coming out of his mouth. "I'm just..." he trailed off slightly.

"Inexperienced?" Kurosaki asked softly, thumb still running back and forth across Hitsugaya's wrist and his hand starting to tangle in the soft white hair. "That's alright, Toushiro. Just do what feels right," he whispered as he bowed his head and started placing light kisses along the side of Hitsugaya's neck down to the junction of neck and shoulder then across the pale skin to his arm. Hitsugaya shivered, arm slipping around Kurosaki's neck, holding him a little closer.

"It all feels weird," Hitsugaya admitted softly, blushing a little as his fingers flexed to brush against Kurosaki's hand.

Kurosaki pulled away slightly before kissing Hitsugaya's forehead gently, smiling. "Do you want me to stop? All you have to do is say so and I will," he replied, moving his hand from Hitsugaya's hair to the side of his face to trace the line of his cheekbone.

Hitsugaya leaned into the touch a little. What was he supposed to do? He had no idea. "I... don't know," he whispered softly. "I'm... not sure what to do," he admitted.

Kurosaki smiled and pulled Hitsugaya close, wrapping both arms around his back. "We'll stop for now, Toushiro. I don't want to overwhelm you," he murmured softly. Hitsugaya rested his head against Kurosaki's shoulder, the faint tremble running through his body finally disappearing. "Do you have rooms here?" he asked softly after several moments of hesitation. "It'd be more comfortable if we lied down," he explained quickly.

Hitsugaya shook his head. "I... mean... I have rooms, but the couch is fine. Matsumoto's out for the night," he said, blushing. There was no way he was giving Kurosaki a view of his bedroom. That was going way too far into far too personal space.

Kurosaki squeezed him gently. "Sorry, I didn't mean to push things," he said quickly. Slowly he shifted and laid back on the couch, pulling Hitsugaya onto his chest.

Hitsugaya shook his head. "It's okay," he whispered, shifting to make himself more comfortable against Kurosaki's body. It was confusing, the entire situation, but Hitsugaya was comfortable, Kurosaki's body was warm and there was no pressing reason to figure it all out so he might as well go along for the ride.